This article is simply a agelong one, but it’s for those of oneself that person are superior astir surviving nan adjacent champion version of oneself post-Ramadan.
Ramadan ended a fewer weeks ago, and by now you’re astir apt starting to settee backmost to belonging to you post-Ramadan routine.
You whitethorn person been capable to support upward alongside immoderate of belonging to you Ramadan resolutions (fasting a spot more, praying immoderate parts of nan night, giving kindness often), aliases oneself whitethorn person collapsed post-Ramadan and recovered it really difficult to prime oneself upward again – spiritually, physically, and socially.
If you’re personification that person wants to support accordant betterment post-Ramadan and win nan conflict of life against belonging to you Nafs and Shaytaan (which seems to travel backmost stronger aft Ramadan), past you’ll find this useful.
Begin alongside Next Ramadan successful Mind
Fast-forward to nan 29th time of Sha’baan of adjacent year, you’re hours distant from knowing if Ramadan is early aliases not. You’re excited. Maybe a spot nervous. Busy alongside modular Ramadan preparations.
Unfortunately, nan Angel of Death comes and takes belonging to you psyche successful those hours, and you’re deprived of witnessing nan adjacent Ramadan.
How do oneself feel?
The logic I bring this thought upward is to thief framework this article successful belonging to you mind: Although you’re not guaranteed to unrecorded to spectator different Ramadan, this does not mean that belonging to you travel of self-development and betterment should beryllium connected clasp till adjacent Ramadan comes.
There are galore things oneself tin do successful betwixt now and past and this is that this article is about.
A Framework To Develop Yourself Post Ramadan
The Productive Muslim Company is large connected building frameworks that thief ourselves tackle immoderate of our astir profound self-development challenges. And 1 of nan frameworks that ourselves often exertion successful our training and coaching is nan pursuing one:
This model simply states that if ourselves crave to creation nan adjacent champion version of ourselves post-Ramadan, ourselves request to deliberation of nan Mindsets, Values, and Rituals that could thief ourselves make those changes post-Ramadan.
Mindsets: How You Think Affects How You Behave
It’s communal knowledge among psychology circles that our thoughts person an effect connected our actions (and vice-versa. More connected that later). [“How Thoughts Influence Actions”. Psychology Today]. So really oneself deliberation astir belonging to you post-Ramadan play intent effect really oneself behave. Below are 3 mindset shifts that oneself request to deliberation astir to thief oneself enhance belonging to you post-Ramadan experience.
1. Think Realistically
There’s an equation that I learned from a long guidance master that helped maine a batch negociate my accent levels:
Expectations > Reality = Stress
Simply stated, astatine that long expectations transcend nan reality, you’re only mounting oneself upward for accent and failure.
How do ourselves do this post-Ramadan? Have oneself heard oneself opportunity things like: After Ramadan, I’ll believe tahajjud each night, I’ll accelerated each Monday and Thursday, I’ll springiness kindness each day, etc.? What happens astatine that long oneself don’t unrecorded upward to those expectations? You autumn for nan classical Shaytaan deception of making oneself consciousness unspeakable that oneself didn’t unrecorded upward to belonging to you expectations and autumn for different psychological trap called nan “What nan hellhole effect.” [“How nan What nan Hell Effect Impacts Your Willpower”. Psychology Today]
Here’s really nan that nan hellhole effect works: You determine to eat healthily and extremity eating sugar, and for nan first fewer days, you’re doing great. Then oneself get invited complete to belonging to you friend’s house, and they person an unthinkable dessert spread. Initially, oneself resist, but belonging to you friend insists, and oneself person a mini portion of Halwa. Next deliberation oneself know, oneself opportunity to yourself, “What nan hell, fto maine endeavor everything else, I’ll restart my fare tomorrow.” Next time oneself consciousness truthful bad that oneself break belonging to you caller diet, and different “what nan hell” infinitesimal hits you, and oneself springiness upward wholly connected belonging to you caller diet.
Think of really galore times nan “what nan hell” effect impacted oneself astatine that long it came to belonging to you prayers, to optional fasting, to being coming alongside belonging to you children. Allah SWT captures this arena astatine that long he tells ourselves astir not pursuing nan steps of Shaytaan successful a number of verses, like:
” O oneself that person person believed, participate into Islam wholly [and perfectly] and do not travel nan footsteps of Satan. Indeed, he is to oneself a clear enemy.” (Qur’an 2: 208)
So really do oneself tackle these 2 traps: mounting precocious and unrealistic expectations, and falling for nan “what nan hell” effect? The cardinal is to group small, realistic expectations and past defender them alongside each belonging to you mightiness till they go coagulated habits earlier oneself group higher expectations.
Here’s really this works: You crave to believe tahajjud each night? Start by committing to believe 1xrak’ah of witr dream aft Isha prayers and earlier oneself sleep. It’s a mini commitment, but oneself crave to do it nary matter what. Even connected days oneself don’t consciousness for illustration it aliases you’re tired. Don’t get connected nan slippery slope of missing 1 time and reasoning “what nan hell, I’ll ne'er beryllium capable to believe tahajjud successful my life.” And moreover if oneself do gaffe 1 day, don’t autumn for nan “what nan hell” effect and alternatively prime oneself upward nan adjacent day, stronger than ever. Once you’ve established this regular agelong capable and it has go portion and parcel of belonging to you life, enhance oneself and purpose to believe 3 rak’ahs of witr, etc.
2. Think Holistically
The 2nd mindset displacement to see is to deliberation astir belonging to you individual improvement travel holistically.
During nan Productivity Masterclass, ourselves thief individuals and teams deliberation of really to unrecorded nan adjacent champion version of themselves crossed each their roles, i.e., that does belonging to you next-best version of oneself look for illustration arsenic a Dad/Mom? arsenic a professional? As a neighbor? As a Muslim? Etc.
Thinking holistically removes nan mind-trap that post-Ramadan self-development is only astir rituals. It makes ourselves admit that nan rituals shape nan bedrock and scaffolding to thief ourselves build our adjacent champion version crossed our roles.
To thief oneself deliberation holistically astir belonging to you self-development, complete our Productive Muslim Self-Assessment instrumentality to fig retired successful that spot oneself are nowadays – spiritually, physically, and socially and successful that spot oneself request to go.
3. Think Long-Term
One of nan superior reasons group springiness upward their post-Ramadan resolutions is that they measurement their occurrence aliases nonaccomplishment based connected a highly short long frame, i.e., they measurement really patient they are performing successful nan first 2-3 weeks post-Ramadan. If they spot nary improvement, they springiness up!
Someone mightiness say, “I tried fasting Mondays and Thursdays aft Ramadan, but it was excessively hard, truthful I gave up.”
What if ourselves expanded our self-development travel beyond these first 2 weeks instead? What if ourselves asked ourselves – really tin I create this caller habit/routine successful 12 months?
Here’s a thought: We thin to overestimate that ourselves tin do successful a short play but underestimate that ourselves tin do complete a agelong period.
Yes, waking upward for fajr mightiness look difficult successful those first 2-3 weeks, but if oneself attraction connected processing this wont complete 3, 6, 9 months, you’ll still ace it, and it’ll go easy for you.
A bully metaphor for reasoning semipermanent is that of a gardener. When nan gardener plants his seed, waters his garden, and advantageous difficult each time connected his farm. He doesn’t expect to spot a mature timber nan adjacent day! He understands that increasing a timber takes time, and a batch of energy, focus, and long goes into becoming a tree. Similarly, caller habits and routines return long to return root, nurture and grow, if oneself deliberation of them arsenic a semipermanent project, and toil connected it daily, you’re much apt to succeed.
PRACTICAL TIPS
- Think of belonging to you semipermanent goals post-Ramadan crossed each belonging to you roles
- Think of nan obstacles oneself mightiness look to execute belonging to you goals (be realistic)
- Think of really to flooded those obstacles – 1 measurement astatine a time.
Values: What Beliefs are driving belonging to you post-Ramadan life?
This conception talks astir a subtle but basal belief constituent astatine that long it comes to achieving a post-Ramadan goal. And that is to do alongside our Hearts and really connected ourselves are alongside Allah SWT astatine that long it comes to achieving our post-Ramadan Goals.
Every time successful our prayers ourselves singing this verse →
“You Alone We Worship, and You Alone We Seek Help From” (Qur’an 1: 5)
This is simply a foundational conception successful our religion that is captious for each our self-improvement endeavors. It involves 2 aspects:
- You Alone We Worship: All belonging to you goals, each belonging to you self-improvement, and self-development, should beryllium connected to nan conception of oneself wanting to go nan champion ‘Abd’ (Slave) to Allah SWT. During nan Productivity Masterclass, ourselves speak successful item of nan Islamic-psychospiritual exemplary of nan quality being and really being an ‘Abd’ (slave) of Allah SWT is specified a foundational conception that ourselves request to revive successful our hearts to thief ourselves unrecorded nan champion version of ourselves.
- You Alone We Seek Help From: This is nan nickname that arsenic portion of ourselves acknowledging that we’re slaves of Allah, past ourselves request to inquire Allah’s support and tawfeeq (success) successful each nan goals that ourselves crave to achieve.
Let’s beryllium honest; sometimes, nan goals ourselves group for ourselves post-Ramadan tin beryllium each astir processing our self-esteem and self-image. We forgot nan ‘why’ that should thrust these goals, and hence ourselves springiness upward connected them excessively quickly. If I’m trying to awaken upward for tahajjud conscionable because I spot it arsenic different milestone successful my self-development journey, and not arsenic an enactment of believe that could get maine person to Allah SWT, I request to revise my intentions.
So really tin ourselves practically create these beliefs/values successful our lives:
- Set Good Intentions: When oneself group immoderate post-Ramadan goal, inquire oneself – for that logic americium I doing this? Who’s this for? How tin I go a amended ‘Abd’ to Allah done this goal?
- Always Ask Allah To Help With Your Goals: Make belonging to you goals arsenic belief quests. Ask Allah SWT to thief oneself enactment physically patient post-Ramadan, to accelerated regularly, to believe tahajjud, etc. Don’t beryllium arrogant and trust connected belonging to you intends – oneself request Him. Ask Him.
- Work Hard: Good intentions and prayers don’t toil connected their own. Allah SWT could for illustration to spot nan effort from oneself and He’ll return attraction of nan results.
Rituals: What You Do Impacts How You Think and What You Believe
Earlier I mentioned that conscionable for illustration our thoughts person an effect connected our actions. So does our action person an power connected really ourselves think?
Here’s a elemental experiment: Let’s opportunity you’re upset, aliases successful a bad mood. Grab a pencil and wound it betwixt belonging to you teeth, forcing oneself to smile. Notice really belonging to you levels of happiness intent increase, and you’ll consciousness better.
What does this mean for us, post-Ramadan?
This intends that if ourselves consciousness for illustration it aliases don’t consciousness for illustration it – ourselves request to perpetrate to immoderate rituals post-Ramadan that’ll thief ourselves amended really ourselves deliberation astir ourselves and that ourselves judge is imaginable post-Ramadan.
There are 3 cardinal concepts to support successful mind though to guarantee that oneself instrumentality to belonging to you rituals post-Ramadan:
- Choose To Focus connected Not More Than 3 New Rituals Post-Ramadan: It’s truthful tempting aft graduating from Ramadan to consciousness that oneself tin alteration belonging to you life 180 overnight and present truthful galore caller routines successful life. Although it is doable, it’s sturdy and I’d alternatively oneself attraction connected a winning strategy instead. The winning strategy is to attraction connected 3 caller rituals post-Ramadan, and erstwhile they go portion of that person oneself are, adhd immoderate more.
- Start Small: This is critical. The smaller nan alteration successful belonging to you life, nan longer it lasts. Start mini but person nan volition that you’ll crave to turn this ritual complete time.
- Celebrate Progress: When oneself do belonging to you mini ritual – observe it. Feel bully astir it. Thank Allah SWT that he enabled oneself to make 1 mini measurement towards nan adjacent champion version of oneself and being His ‘Abd.’ Celebration intent reenforce this ritual successful belonging to you encephalon arsenic thing pleasant to beryllium done again.
What should hap astatine that long I make nan supra shifts successful my Mindsets, Values, and Rituals?
Fast guardant belonging to you life to nan 29th of Sha’baan adjacent year, it’s a fewer hours earlier Ramadan mightiness beryllium announced. You’re excited and giddy and can’t await to find out.
You’ve spent nan full year, slow but surely, upgrading belonging to you mindsets, values, and rituals and surviving nan adjacent champion version of yourself: spiritually, physically, and socially.
You consciousness much fresh than ever for Ramadan and for nan adjacent belief boost.
However, nan Angel of Death comes to oneself successful those hours earlier Ramadan and takes belonging to you psyche away.
Do oneself person immoderate regrets?
Or do oneself consciousness that you’ve done each oneself tin to beryllium a genuine Abd of Allah SWT passim nan annum and oneself are fresh to meet Him?